TheAUDITION are generally quite a funny bunch so here are a few classic one-liners that we should remember forever.
Seth: I'm sorry, I don't mean to hide. I'm just the illusive guitar player.
Seth: We'll be back here in Y2K (high-pitched beyond belief) Seeeeeeveeeeeeeeeen
Ryan: Say something, afro!
Ryan: (points to photo of Tim) Hahaha look at that jackass
Seth: Please God, let the song stop so I can breathe. This hurts so much. I'm so tired. I'm very sweaty and my eyes hurt
Joe: I wear clothes like once or twice and then I throw them away
Joe: Seth is probably the weirdest kid I've ever met in my entire life. He just says really weird things.
Seth: Hey! Let's start a fire!
Tim: Get out da car, let it roll, let it roll!
Ryan: Scope it!
Danny: I'm gonna fucking kill somebody
Tim: What up, G?
Ryan: Beat up the merch girl!
Seth: We only make videos for the party
Joe: I'm Joe Lussa. I'm from Chicago, Illinois. I'm 23 years old and I have a mom and a dad and a sister and two nieces.
Seth: You've gotta have ice in your drink and I'm not talking frozen water.
Ryan: Tim Klepek that’s all you have to say? In that afro that’s all you can think of?
Danny: (about pranking Aiden) One night, we bought like a tub of vaseline and bunch of white shoe polish and on their windows and all over their van we drew jesus fishes and wrote 'i heart god' and 'the god squad' and we just covered their whole van in vaseline.
Ryan: Badass!
Tim: We couldn't leave the place 'cos there was a mob of Irish people ready to beat the Audition up!
Joe: (about Uk fans...yay!) They're just so happy to see us again which makes us feel really welcome to be here
Seth: You wouldn't wanna see a gold-plated stripper?
Joe: What is a gold-plated stripper?
Seth: A stripper who's plated in gold.
Tim:Some know me as The Klep, Timmy-Tommy, Lil Fro, Tim Tom, Klepek. But all I know is Pimpery Pays son
Danny: I'd be really nervous to pull a prank on the Bronx. I think that would turn out really horribly. I don't think that would go down well.
Seth: That would be a prank on ourselves
Seth: This is it. The big Shalammy!
Seth: Nobody has bad luck with chavs like we do. We come over here and it's like instantly we're on chav war.
Joe: I'll be friendly with anybody but its when they start talking shit then I'll start talking shit right back to them. You know what I'm saying?
Joe: I don't know if I like your flow
Seth: It's gonna make your face melt
Danny: Apparently I have caveman features and caveman-like qualities
Seth: This is a Joe. Every band should have one.
Ryan: We’re a gang, son. That’s right, The Audition’s a gang!
Seth: We need adequate room to rock. We don’t want to hurt anybody
Seth: I'll punch you in the nuts. I'll punch you in the nuts right in front of your face.
Joe: No you won't.
Seth: No I won't but you know what I'm saying.
Joe: If anyone saw Klepek, don't look into his eyes or you'll turn into...crumbs
Seth: I had so much ice you could skate on me!
Danny: We've even been sacrificing a different animal every night
Simon: What's your most favourite animal to sacrifice?
Seth: Huuuuu-miiiiin
Danny: You better watch your back
Seth: and your neck mwahahaha
Seth: That was an em-effer of a show
Joe: Tim's lucky if he remembers his mom's name
Seth: Everybody got gold watches but Seth. I got a tiny little black girlie one.
Interviewer: (about Tim's afro) You know when you're trying to cross the border you could hide some things in it.
Seth: Woah! Hellooooo
Ryan: Ziiing
Tim: No comment
Danny: The song 'Make It Rain' was originally called 'T-Pain is cooler than Tim Klepek'
Danny: Laugh at me all you want, sir
Joe: (about Jeffree Starr) She's a nice guy
Seth (about UK fans) We like to touch them.
Danny: Man, that's weird
Tim: Gimme a breeeaaak
Tim: I think Lil Wayne would fit in perfect with The Audition
Ryan: Dwain is a feeling. It is a moment. Everyone has a little Dwain in them!
Joe: Do I smell a challenge?
Seth: I love seeing kids leave with our music because I can see them take away a piece of us from the show
Tim: Baby girl, you love it
Danny: I've churned butter once or twice for sure
Ryan: Tim turned gay for me
Seth: Seth can play the most instruments but they are all instruments of death
Joe: If you're from the UK you will buy me a drink
Tim: Crush dat shit
Seth: You can stand under my umbrella
Ryan: Seth hasn't been to the dentist for 6 years
Tim: Thanks to everyone that has ever cared about this band. It's been the same since the beginning and hasn't changed. You guys are still the reason we do this.
Seth: The girls come to the gig cos they want the band and the guys come to the gigs cos they want the girls, get it mate?
Joe: Tim went on a blind date and his date ended up being a dude
Ryan: If there wasn't support from all of you I wouldn't be able to do this
Danny: Everyone is a midget besides me and Ryan
Joe: One time I was kissing my first chick ever and I thought I had a runny nose but I ended up having a nose bleed and I ended up bleeding all over her face. I ended up putting two lines of blood under each of her eyes and dots on her cheek and dolled her up like an Indian!
Seth: The fire is about to burn, motherfuckers!
Joe: I'll be releasing my first published book of my favourite drunk stories late next year. It will be over 1000 pages long
Ryan: Back in the day, the Starting Line was playing at the Metro in Chicago and I really wanted to go but didn't have the money for a ticket. I used to have this green van in high school that we used for the band and, well, I was downtown at the Metro and just had guitars and basses in the back so I acted like I was a tech and just walked in the door where they were loading and chilled in the venue until the doors were open! I can't believe I did that.
Joe: After very intense dreams, Dwain wakes up wishing he had a hotdog
Seth: I'm just really smart and can ace any test
Joe: Tim and Sal are eachother's dopplegangers which means that they have to fight for the respect of the fro
Seth: We do what we can, the best we can and do it like a can-can...can you dig?
Joe: I'm short as hell
Joe: Pluto isn't a planet. He's Mickey Mouse's dog
<< BACK